This bit of news is a day old, but Senator Lito Lapid never gets old.

Lapid wants the country’s schoolchildren to carry no more than 15 percent of their weight in their schoolbags, a measure that Education Secretary Armin Luistro was quick to pooh pooh.

After all, he said, there are bags that have wheels now (as there were in 1988 when I started school).

But Lapid says he’s only thinking of the children.

“If only I did not go through such hard labor in the mountain—I was a wood gatherer and I carried sugar cane when I was young—I should have been taller because the Lapids are very big. I should have been taller than my father who was 5 (feet) 11 (inches),” said the 5’9” Lapid.

“This is from my own experience. Because I carried heavy wood and sugar cane, I became smaller as it probably had an effect on my spinal column. I don’t want other kids to suffer the same with the heavy bags they are forced to carry to school. They still have very young bones, do you want them to get a bent spinal column?”

The bill will probably not be passed by the Senate because the sheer amount of work getting a bill passed is more of a hassle than just, I don’t know, not putting all your shit in one bag.

Luckily, we have a shortage of textbooks, so school kids won’t have to carry all that much anyway.